


3 in the AM

by Oatmealo



Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Drug Use, Kissing, gordon's Issues are brought up. black mesa fucked him UP, the science team live together, they/himrey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:02:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25188388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oatmealo/pseuds/Oatmealo
Summary: Gordon didn't peep up yet. Might not be a talking kind of day, but the silence was starting to stress them out a bit. So they dug around in their hoodie pocket for a lighter and one of their blunts, flicking the old lighter a couple times, sighing slightly after taking a hit. Gordon was looking at him pointedly. Benrey was expecting to be chewed out for this one."Do you think it would help me?" Gordon asked instead, breaking the silence."Whuh?""Y'know. Weed. With the, like, the anxiety stuff."
Relationships: Benrey/Gordon Freeman
Comments: 4
Kudos: 224





	3 in the AM

3am, and Gordon Freeman was awake. So was Benrey, but Benrey constantly flipped flopped between never sleeping and sleeping half the day away, so it wasn't exactly a significant occurrence. They sat outside on the apartment balcony in near silence, Benrey at the small table and Gordon on the floor, head laid against the wall. Benrey's fingers tapped rhythmically against the table. They waited patiently. It wasn't a good idea to try and force any kind of words out of Gordon when he was stressed, especially if you wanted something other than frustration. 

Gordon didn't peep up yet. Might not be a talking kind of day, but the silence was starting to stress them out a bit. So they dug around in their hoodie pocket for a lighter and one of their blunts, flicking the old lighter a couple times, sighing slightly after taking a hit. Gordon was looking at him pointedly. Benrey was expecting to be chewed out for this one.

"Do you think it would help me?" Gordon asked instead, breaking the silence.  
"Whuh?"  
"Y'know. Weed. With the, like, the anxiety stuff." 

'The anxiety stuff' was a touchy topic. After Black Mesa, Gordon kept flinching at noises, he hated being in a room alone, and hadn't slept peacefully once. Gordon ignored Dr. Coomer’s suggestion of seeing a therapist, and he barely even talked to Tommy about how he really felt regarding what happened, let alone Benrey. A selfish part of Benrey was grateful for that. They weren’t good at words, and they didn’t particularly enjoy the idea of feeding the little ball of guilt in their chest. Actions were easy, teasing was easy, singing was easy. Talking was not easy. Benrey shrugged before getting up, dragging the chair across the ground with a loud screech, and plopping themself on the ground next to Gordon. They passed him the blunt.

“Don’t cough.” They smirked.  
“I won’t! I’ve smoked before, Benrey.”  
“Ohhh, not a virgin huh? Your lungs’ cherry popped? Huh? Go ahead.”

Gordon had already been taking a hesitant drag when Benrey dropped the cherry line, and immediately coughed, smoke filling the air around them. His throat burned.

“Cringe, dude. Watch the master.” Benrey produced another blunt from their hoodie pocket, (Gordon tried not to think too hard about what else was probably in there, and how long this thing might have called the pocket it’s home,) and lit it for themself, again struggling with the old lighter. They took a long drag, and looking back at Gordon smugly, blew a couple rings, tinged with what looked like a bit of blue to pink Sweet Voice.  
“Show off.” He scoffed.

Benrey laughed softly, little pink and white orbs leaving their mouth. Gordon took another drag, this time only letting out a small cough. His eyes focused on the Sweet Voice, the colors stood out to him. Tommy didn’t tell him what these ones meant. Oh well. He felt himself relax and the world felt like it slowed down. It took him a minute to register that he never stopped staring at Benrey’s mouth, the Sweet Voice color long faded.

“What’s up Gordos? Like what you see?” They tilted their head and smiled at him.  
“No! I mean, I was just, the colors? They were pretty. What did they mean?”  
“Oh. Wha? Nothing.” They turned away and finished off their blunt, their face tinged a little blue. Gordon found himself thinking that the shade was pretty, as pretty as Benrey blushing could be, at least. He shook the thought away. It wasn’t the first time he’d thought of something like that, but it wasn’t exactly a thought he wanted to examine too closely either. He found himself acutely aware of Benrey’s hand sneaking it’s way on top of his own, warm and weirdly soft. His painted (and chipped? Gordon would help him repaint them later) claw-like nails gently poked his hand, and fabric of the hoodie sleeve grazed his skin. Gordon Freeman felt like he was floating. 

The hoodie was soft, Benrey was warm, so logically the correct next step was resting against them. Gordon wonders what he would think of this moment, if he would have seen it while still in Black Mesa. Probably that he was insane. He’d probably think he was insane for a lot of reasons, to be honest. But he’d gotten to know Benrey, over these past months. He’d forgiven them, to an extent. Benrey leaned their head against his own, their helmet clunking softly. Gordon moved his hand slightly so Benrey’s was actually holding it. The cicadas buzzed slightly in the background. Everything was fuzzier but sharper and Gordon found himself forgetting the nightmare that woke him up in the first place.  
“Can I kiss you?” Benrey asked, and Gordon, thrown off, lifted himself away from Benrey to face them. His face was hot. His heart jumped a bit.  
“What?” Gordon sputtered. Smooth.  
“Kissy? Smooch? Please?”  
For a moment, Gordon was tempted to say no, to push Benrey away. Instead, Gordon was stunned silent, staring at Benrey. For a pregnant moment, neither of them moved. Then Benrey laughed nervously.  
“Nevermind, jk, unless, haha-” Benrey was cut off by Gordon closing the gap between them, his lips brushing against theirs. He lingered for a second, Benrey frozen in place. Gordon could practically hear the dial-up noises.  
“Good to know I had a way to shut you up at my disposal this whole time.” Gordon smiled smugly. His face was flushed. He let out a noise of surprise as Benrey retaliated, grabbing the front of Gordon’s loose orange tank top and kissing him back. Tentatively, Benrey parted their mouth, and Gordon parted his as well. Benrey took the lead, and Gordon found himself tasting sweetness on them. It was warm, and reminded him of a strawberry coated in white chocolate. Like valentine’s day. When they parted again to breathe, Gordon was lightheaded and high in more ways than one.  
“Means you’re the one I like.” Benrey mumbled, catching their breath.  
“What does?”  
“Sweet voice. Pink to white. You asked earlier.”  
“Oh.”  
Despite the fact that Benrey’s tongue was just wrestling with his own, that was what resurfaced all of the buried feelings in Gordon’s mind from the past few weeks. The feelings that told him deep down, he liked Benrey too. That bros don’t just share a bed, even if it’s easy to justify by thinking a good host doesn’t make a friend sleep on the couch. That bros don’t think about how pretty their bros’ eyes are, or how nice their hand looks to hold.  
“I…I think I like you too?” He nearly whispered. Benrey’s pupils grew like a fuckin’ cat.  
“Nice. Was hoping you’d figure that out. I’m kind of a sexy beast.”  
“Oh wow. Revoking what I said.” He deadpanned, but a smile betrayed his words.  
“Nooooouhhh. Be my gamer bf please? Please?” Benrey slumped his whole body weight on top of Gordon’s lap.  
“You’re so mean. You’re killing me. Please?”  
“Fine! Yes, I will be your ‘Gamer Bf.’ Happy?” He laughed out, a genuine laugh.  
“Yesssss. Sweet.”  
Benrey lifted themself off of Gordon’s lap, instead opting to lean into him. The sun was coming up, and while in the distance he could hear the telltale sounds of Dr. Coomer’s 6am alarm, he didn’t get up quite yet. He just took in Benrey’s warmth, and realized that things might start to be ok. He had the science team’s love, but most importantly, he had Benrey’s love. He’d give that therapist a call later.

**Author's Note:**

> THANKS FOR READING THIS! I've never really published anything on here I could really sit down and say "yknow, im kind of proud of this" until now lol  
> I hope yall liked it! Accidentally solidifying myself as the weed benrey guy with every bit of content i made whoops.  
> Find me on tumblr here: https://oatmealo.tumblr.com/


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